Just when you thought you knew way too much random shit about former ‘Real Housewife’ Danielle Staub (I mean, it really doesn’t get much more informative than a graphic sex tape, does it?) along comes testimony that Pablo Escobar’s Medellin drug cartel put a hit on her back in the 1980s. You read that right, folks. Pablo Escobar. A hit. Danielle Staub.
NOTICE: Before we continue with this story please put away your Remington rifles, the hit was called off unfortunatly.
Right ok, where was I. It seems that our friend Danielle used to run with a rather tough crowd. According to RadarOnline.com, long before her ‘Housewife’ days, Danielle was living in Miami, working as a prostitute and went by the name Angela Minelli. She fell into the world of drugs, and soon sought out opportunities to sell them to make some quick cash for her whorish needs. But when $100,000 worth of cocaine was stolen during a deal, Staub quite literally found herself in Escobar’s crosshairs.
All this came out during a testimony in a deposition in a slander suit against her filed by her ex-husband, Kevin Maher. Daniel Aguilar, who was an “enforcer” for the Medellin cartel in Miami, revealed under oath that Stuab came to him and said, “I have this guy and he wants to buy big weight … four kilos of cocaine.”
While the details are not clear, Aguilar alleges he paid the $100,000 to save her life after the failed drug deal, and is now attempting to get the money back.
Aguilar appeared in court as a witness for Kevin Maher, Staub’s ex, who is suing the reality star for $5 million over her accusations that he raped her on broken glass and hanged her dog, you know, that usual story.
So let me ask you this. The Medellin cartel is usually pretty efficient right… So why the hell did they have to screw this one up?
Since Danielle Staub of Real Housewives has taken a page from the Kendra playbook, here are “leaked” stills that TMZ has acquired. If Kendra has taught us anything, is that the following will occur with the certainty of the sun rising again tomorrow (unless Britney decides to go out without a bra and point those nipples directly at its core): Fat check will be sent to her. Fat check will be immediately cashed. An interview on some morning, mid-afternoon or evening show will follow where said “victim” will lament about the shame the sex tape has brought her. And she will demand renewal of her reality show because ratings will now be higher (sorry, now we’re just reading from Kendra’s book).
