Archive for the "French" Category

Unexpected Luxury Mother’s Day Gift Guide

Are you in a gift rut when it comes to Mother’s Day? Not sure what to get mom that you haven’t given her before? What if you just want to do something your mom won’t see coming? After all these years, it will be great to keep her on her toes. - STORMp3 In Shower [...]
 

Last Minute Gift Guide: Parisienne French: Chic Phrases, Slang and Style

Gift for, girlie girl, fashionista, Francophile, language lover, foreign movie buff. I am an unapologetic Francophile. I love all things French or Parisienne. There may or may not be an architectural drawing of the Eiffel Tower on my wall. My new favorite book is Parisienne French: Chic Phrases, Slang and Style. Not only does Rhianna [...]
 

Gérard Depardieu Gets Pissy on a Plane…Literally

French acting legend Gérard Depardieu was on an airplane with 100 other people and had to pee, but the flight attendant said he couldn’t go until after takeoff. So the French actor took matters into his own hands: He whipped out his dick and peed in the aisle. No, seriously:

“I will only confirm that he, in effect, urinated in the plane,” a spokeswoman for the Air France-KLM subsidiary said, confirming a report on Europe 1 radio, which interviewed a passenger who witnessed the incident.

According to the passenger, who was not named, the 62-year-old was visibly inebriated and tried to stand up before take-off, when passengers are asked to wear seatbelts, declaring: “I want to piss, I want to piss.”

When a stewardess asked him to sit and wait 15 minutes until the jet took off and reached cruising altitude, he said he could not wait. “And there and then he stood up and did it on the floor,” she told the French broadcaster.

“We could see he had been drinking. The stewardess was dumbfounded,” she added. “No-one said anything. It all happened with courtesy. Mr Depardieu sat back down and the plane returned to the parking area to be cleaned.”

Umm wait what, “in effect”. The rest of that conversation probably went like this:

“In effect, he urinated on the plane.”
“In effect?”
“Yes.”
“What is the effect referred to in this context?”
“The effect of urine flowing out of his penis and onto the floor.”
“Ah. That effect.”
“Effectively, yes.”

Air France partner CityJet – which operated the regional carrier Depardieu marked in the manner of a male dog – has been tweeting jokes about the incident ever since.

As you may have seen on the news, we are busy mopping the floor of one of our planes this morning…

 

This is Perfectly Normal for a Son and Mother… as Long as the Son is Gay

Stephanie Seymour got a lot of attention last month when she was frolicking on a beach with her 17-year-old son, Peter Brant II, which set the blogosphere aflame that they were bumpin’ uglies (the incest kind).

Well PB2 headed over to his FaceBook page and said “this whole Beach kiss scandal” was a “malicious attack.” He knew the paparazzi was watching, and says he did no wrong and that he doesn’t like the vag anyway:

“My mother and I are very close as she is with all her children. She often hugs and kisses me and my siblings in a manner that is intimate. Any mother in the world does the same. That day on the beach we walked around with each other completely aware of the presence of photographers there.”
“We have nothing to hide and with that in mind I would like to say that I am openly gay. At my age my mother and I are almost like friends and I feel open to talk to her about anything (and yes, our relationship may be different because of my sexuality).”

Oh, I’ve heard that one before, the old “I’m gay, it’s OK for me to touch your boobs and stick my tongue in your mouth” card.

Besides, he didn’t say, “I don’t touch my mom’s breasts”. He didn’t say “That isn’t a boner”. He didn’t say, “I don’t bang my mom”. So really, everything we’ve surmised from these pictures must be true. As you were people.

Stephanie Seymour and her Gay Son Stephanie Seymour and her Gay Son Stephanie Seymour and her Gay Son Stephanie Seymour and her Gay Son Stephanie Seymour and her Gay Son
 

Gerard Butler done fake-banging Jennifer Aniston

laurie-cholewa-photos-sexy-0002Remember a few days ago when Gerard Butler publicly stuck his middle finger in Jennifer Aniston’s ice-cube machine per The Bounty Hunter producers’ instructions? We’re guessing they asked him to get her pregnant next per the signed agreement and that’s when he freaked out and jumped ship. Or better yet, jumped on to another chin. In 60 seconds flat. Yes, Gerard Butler is camping his penis in French soil this week and she goes by the name of Laurie “satellite dish for chin” Cholewa. Guess Jennifer Aniston didn’t do a good enough job hooking him with hers. Did we mention they both have big chins? Ok, this is getting juvenile, somebody stop us before we say “big chins” again!

Via People Magazine:

Jennifer Aniston isn’t the only woman to have enjoyed some private time with Gerard Butler in Paris recently.

Butler, 40, who took a private cruise on the Seine with Aniston a week ago Saturday, struck up a rapport with local TV interviewer Laurie Cholewa that same weekend – and then returned to Paris midweek for a date with Cholewa, 29, that stretched from the day into the evening.

The two were seen strolling hand in hand through the French capital, visiting landmarks like the Louvre museum, where they ate lunch at the Café Marly. They had dinner on the Left Bank that same evening.

A source tells PEOPLE that Butler “completely cracked” for Cholewa during their sit-down interview about The Bounty Hunter, his new film with Aniston.

Cholewa, a film reporter, hosts a Friday-night show on local cable channel, Direct 8.