Archive for the "girlfriend" Category

Jesus Take The Wheel: 16-Year-Old Teen Stabs His 17-Year-Old Girlfriend To Death After Argument And Then Hides Her Body In The Woods

jennifer siller

Why can’t these teens just break up with each other? Why stab someone to death and lose your freedom?

Teen Stabs Girlfriend To Death After Argument

According to The NY Daily News

A Pennsylvania teen stabbed his on-again, off-again girlfriend to death on a town park’s hiking trail after a bitter argument, police said.

Tristan Brian Arthur Stahley, 16, is alleged to have knifed 17-year-old Julianne Siller repeatedly in the throat and neck between 9 p.m. and 10:20 p.m. Saturday.

Cops claim the pair — who had been seeing each other since January — were walking on a hiking trail in a park in the Philadelphia suburb of Skippack Township when they started arguing.

Stahley purportedly freaked out and whipped out an orange-handled knife.

His attack was so brutal, police said that they could not yet count how many times he had plunged the knife into her body.

He then allegedly hid her lifeless corpse in the woods near the trail, reports The Mercury.

But he soon ran home and told his mom he’d broken up with Siller and that he’d killed her.

Another relative called the police, who then discovered Siller’s body.

The teen was arrested and charged with one count each of first-degree murder, third-degree murder and criminal possession of a weapon.

He has been remanded to the Montgomery County Correctional Facility without bond.

More and more young women are becoming victims of domestic situations. What do you think needs to be done to stop the violence?


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Dear Shae, Can I Get Pregnant Even Though I’m On Top? – S808 Lena

Dear Shae, Can I get pregnant even though I’m on top?

- S808 Lena
Dear S808 Lena,
Seriously? You can get pregnant whenever he uses his d!ck.
You can get pregnant even though you’re on top.
You can get pregnant sitting down.
You can get pregnant on the ground.
You can get pregnant here or there.
You can get pregnant anywhere.
But could you?  Would you?  With a goat?
Could you?  Would you?  On a boat?
Could you?  Would you?  In the rain?
Could you?  Would you?  On a train?
No but seriously, if you’ve got to ask this question: stick your finger in his butt as he is about to orgasm…this will stop the sperm from swimming out.

 

 

 

Have a questions you’d like Shae to answer?

 

The Day Before The Super Bowl

Let me guess. You probably woke up really early today and tried to beat the crowd at the store, right? You waited until the last day to get snacks for your party, and now you are in full panic mode. You are rushing down the aisles, hip checking every grandma that dares to get in your way. “TOSTITOS! TOSTITOS! WHERE ARE THE TOSTITOS?” you scream. A polite woman to your right says; “There are none left. But they have some goldfish over there” you slowly turn to her and say; “Oh, do they? Do they? That’s great. Maybe I’ll pick some up after I go buy some apple juice and blankets for nap time.”

You have turned into a monster. A snack obsessed monster and nothing is going to get in your way. Then, you make your way to the dip aisle…oh the dip aisle. Bean dip, cheese dip, spinach dip, low-fat bean dip. You stand there confused and afraid, like a lost little puppy that is miles away from home. Finally, you just close your eyes and pick one from the shelf, but when you open your eyes — you realize you picked up the spinach dip. Go on and put it back for the bean dip, we all know that is what you are going to do anyway.

Three hours later you manage to stumble your way back home. You just blew $300 on a bunch of snacks that will be gone before halftime. But, who cares? It’s the freaking Super Bowl!

Now you are in the kitchen, stocking up the fridge with beer and soft drinks. Things are starting to look like they might actually come together, but then your girlfriend walks into the room. She walks right up to you and kisses you. “RED FLAG! RED FLAG!” You scream in your head. She never just walks in the room and kisses you. She wants something…

After the kiss, she comments on how good you smell today. “Good? I haven’t even showered…oh this is bad. This is really bad.” you think to yourself. “What do you want?” you ask her. She goes on this long spiel about how she thinks it’d be a delightful idea if everyone showed up to the party dressed as their favorite player. Right away you recognize how horrible that idea sounds, but you can’t show your disgust. You tell her that you’ll think about it, but never mention it again. Crisis averted.

And that is all before noon.

The rest of the day is spent on the phone, answering questions from your friends. Larry wants to make sure no peanuts are mixed in with the chips because he is allergic. Dylan wants to make sure that Lisa isn’t going to be there because he “hit it and quit it.” And, John called five times making sure you got bean dip and not that disgusting spinach dip.

Why do you put yourself through this every year? Because it’s the Super Bowl! When you successfully pull off the best Super Bowl party on the block, it will all be worth it.

Keep your head up… The Day Before the Super Bowl The Day Before the Super Bowl The Day Before the Super Bowl The Day Before the Super Bowl

 

A-Rod’s new girlfriend could probably beat him up

Here’s A-Rod sunbathing in his Miami home with his new girlfriend who just happens to be a fitness trainer, nutritionist AND winner of FAME Fitness World Championships 2007 and at this point, I’m pretty sure he demands they hand over a resume before he decides to have sex with them. “It says here that you do 1,000 reps a day, very good, very good, and that you lift weights for four hours every day, excellent, excellent…ah, It doesn’t say anywhere here were you had your post-op done. Thailand, perhaps? What, you were born a woman?? Lady, get the hell out of my house!!”

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David Hasselhoff got dumped by girlfriend at this event

Here’s David Hasselhoff leaving Clinton’s Celebrity Fastcard Event in London with his girlfriend Hayley last night, moments before she dumped him (he actually tweeted this a couple of hours later: “So Hayley Roberts Has dumped me”) and for the life of me I can’t understand what propelled her to do such a cruel, cruel thing. Was it perhaps that he wanted to pass alcohol breath as CPR to all the Baywatch-themed ladies at the event? Or that he confused a man’s head for a giant cheeseburger and went for it? Or that he was flirting with the pavement moments after he arrived at the event? Really, Hayley, give the man a break! After all, he did propose to you…4 TIMES!!! At least no one can blame him for lack of eagerness. Or inability to humiliate himself over and over and over again.

'FASTCARD LUNCH PARTY' - DEPARTURES the-crap-we-missed-1019-05-480x720 article-0-0E6E517E00000578-651_468x636 article-2050710-0E6E517600000578-201_468x532 'FASTCARD LUNCH PARTY' - DEPARTURES FLYNET - Clintons Launch Party For Celebrity Fastcard VIP Guests
 

Adam Levine’s missing torso

Adam Levine posed with his Russian girlfriend Anna I-arrived-in-the-mail-Vyalitsyna for the cover of Russian Vogue, and that 99.9% of you who have yet to notice that half of Adam’s torso is missing because you’re too busy staring at his bride’s superb ass, you may have ADD, but at least you don’t have Spock’s (aka Zachary Quinto) problem of finding the love for vagina highly irrational and off-putting. Gotta love photo-shop bloopers.

PS: The junk-handling from the mail bride pics are from a different shoot with Cosmopolitan UK, because somehow that will save the penis from cancer (Levine’s charity). We’re guessing this one’s about saving the anus?? Or the rain-forest, it could be either way.

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Yep, we were right. A-Rod likes the penis

It has only been a couple of weeks since A-Rod split up with Cameron Diaz, and well, we’re back to those freakish, almost Madonna-esque man arms he so loves to have wrapped around him when his spine needs minor adjustment. Meet testicle lady #3 leaving his Miami house yesterday and she looks perfectly capable of hoisting a boat out of the water with just one arm. Which is what A-Rod must have been thinking when he tried to hide behind a parking meter. “But baby, all I wanted to do is give you an impromptu handjob!” This is a love/hate relationship, isn’t it.

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The Hoff threatens to kill himself if girlfriend doesn’t marry him…obviously he’s sober these days

David Hasselhoff (here showing how recurrent alcoholism can be so much fun) has proposed to his girlfriend three times so far, and thrice he has been denied. But certain she will eventually realize being a donor for his failing pancreas is something worth getting married for, he will keep proposing until she says “yes”. Or until he gets himself killed. Either way, this is not going to have a happy ending.

Via Zimeye.org:

“I proposed to her when we were in South Africa when we were under the ocean in a cage watching sharks and she refused even after I had told her that I was going to open the gate of the cage and we will be eaten by sharks.

“I even proposed to her in front of charging elephants and she still said no so I will again propose, as I do bungee jumping or the swing,”

He added: “For the next three days we are here in Victoria Falls and we intend to do a lot of adventure activities as we have a lot of fun with my fiancee and my cousin, as we see the world together.

“So basically we are having more of fun than anything. Here in Victoria Falls it is very spiritual. I think that sitting on the edge of the falls is the closest that you’ll ever come to God. And you’re going to want to jump.

“It is so powerful, you’ll just want to give yourself back to God .”

- BANG! Showbiz

 

Thursday’s Miscellaneous Junk You Might Like (9.22.2011)

The new season of Topmodel has started so Tyra’s ass is back to eating skinny supermodel-wannabes.

Rosie O’Donnell must some incredible lesbian charm we don’t about because she can get girlfriends to go with her coffee now. True story, she met this one at Starbuck’s.

Simon Cowell has opted for Botox and fillers. Because his inability to control his facial expressions was bothering him.

If you squint hard enough you can see Amanda Seyfried’s nipples.

Vanessa Hudgens still having sex with that Disney kid. Because she has a thing for extra soft hair-free baby skin. (We’re talking about his face you perverts!!)

Elisabetta Canalis shows us why George Clooney kept her for so long.

Beyonce puts on her disappearing fetus act again.

We get it. Justin Bieber wants Selena Gomez to be his octomom. He posted this.

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81-Year Old Astronaut Buzz Aldrin Cheats On Wife With 50-Year Old Hottie

Buzz Aldrin was recently seen out with his hot new girlfriend making out like teenagers and some who obviously are against granting soon-to-be-dead people’s last wishes find it a bit tacky and inappropriate since he just dumped his third wife of many years back in June. Er, did you see his wife’s face (pic below)? Buzz, you had absolutely no choice, buddy. It’s like when someone cuts the supply of oxygen going into your spacesuit. You must abort the mission, there’s no alternative.

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David Hasselhoff proposes to girlfriend twice…and twice he gets turned down

Here’s one of the two pics David Hasselhoff posted over the weekend showing him on one arthritic knee in Cape Town, South Africa proposing to 31-year old British girlfriend of 7 months (whom he met by the way when she asked him for an autograph in England – not at all proof that The Hoff has standards and will bed anyone who utters the words “Baywatch”, “Knight Rider” “and i’m willing to hold your head up as you vomit in me toilet” in the same sentence). Said girlfriend turned him down twice and forced him to turn to Twitter and ask his fans to come up with ways to persuade her to say yes (“er, i’ll give you part of my royalty fees from Baywatch”, comes to mind?). Honestly, we have no idea why this chick won’t marry The Hoff. Is it that he loves to pick fights with parrots? Perhaps his passion for eating regurgitated cheeseburgers off the floor? Or his soft spot for trannies and tight leather/swollen testicles? We could go on all day here. This woman is obviously blind to the diamond of a man that’s staring her in the face (or somewhere in the vicinity of her face because Cape Town got kinda shaky after the 68th drink)!

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Charlie Sheen Shows Off Either a New Girlfriend or a Random Hooker

Charlie Sheen has a new braless blonde girlfriend/hooker/porn star/a mouth for him to exhale his cigarette smoke into, with whom he posed for kissy paparazzi pictures. As in, they walked two inches out the door and onto the sidewalk, stood in front of the door, and started making out. When asked for the lady’s name, Sheen replied, “None of your f-ing business,” but if you’re a celebrity and you invite the paparazzi to take your picture, that literally is their business, isn’t it? Taking pictures of you and your meandering tongue is how they will send their children to college.

Lucky for Charlie she seems like the type that swallows,  so no preggies with this one!

Charlie Sheen Shows Off his New Girlfriend Charlie Sheen Shows Off his New Girlfriend Charlie Sheen Shows Off his New Girlfriend Charlie Sheen Shows Off his New Girlfriend Charlie Sheen Shows Off his New Girlfriend Charlie Sheen Shows Off his New Girlfriend
 

Malcolm at the End – Frankie Muniz Hit His Girlfriend Elycia Turnbow

Frankie Muniz allegedly put a gun to his head and threatened to pull the trigger during a fight with his girlfriend Elycia Turnbow at their home in Phoenix, Arizona on Friday night. I guess he wanted to make a stand that she was not the boss of him, now… More like “Napoleon Complex in the Middle”. Amirite?

100 bucks says he will be joining Macaulay Culkin in a Barcelona sex club by Friday and then Charlie Sheen in rehab on Sunday.

TMZ reports:

TMZ obtained a police report filed in Phoenix, AZ last Friday. According to the report, Muniz and his girlfriend, Elycia Turnbow, were arguing in their home about “prior relationships.” Elycia told cops, Frankie “grabbed a gun and held it to his head, possibly with the intent of committing suicide.”
Elycia says she became worried and called one of Frankie’s bandmates to take him to the hospital.
Frankie tells a different story, claiming Elycia was screaming and yelling at him when he “fell and hit his head.” Muniz says that’s why he went to the hospital. Muniz denied putting a gun to his head, but did say, “I grabbed the case, but not the gun … it isn’t even loaded.”
In fact … the cops did find the gun and it was loaded.
Muniz was released a short time later, went home, and just after 10PM the same night, things exploded back at the house. According to the police report, Elycia says, Frankie “punched her in the back of the head, and threw her into a wall while in the downstairs bedroom.”

Dear Frankie,

I know exactly what you’re going through. Women just don’t understand­. No one does. But If you ever need to talk, grab a drink or yell at some prostitute­s, I’d be more than happy to help you get through this.

Sincerely,
Charlie Sheen

Frankie Muniz and his girlfriend Elycia Turnbo Frankie Muniz and his girlfriend Elycia Turnbo Frankie Muniz and his girlfriend Elycia Turnbo Frankie Muniz and his girlfriend Elycia Turnbo Frankie Muniz and his girlfriend Elycia Turnbo Frankie Muniz and his girlfriend Elycia Turnbo
 

Amber Heard is a Lesbian, a Smoking Hot Lesbian

Uber hottie Amber Heard who you’ll know from appearing for a whole 5 minutes in films like Zombieland and Pineapple Express and who will soon appear as Jonny Depp’s love interest in ‘The Rum Diaries,’ just came out of the closet with her girlfriend, photographer Tasya van Ree, whom she has been carpet munching with since 2008.

Speaking to the gay rights-focused entertainment site AfterEllen.com, Heard said coming out was both a personal and moral triumph.

“I think when I became aware of my role in the media, I had to ask myself an important question ‘Am I part of the problem?’” she told the the website. “And I think that when millions and millions of hard-working, tax paying Americans are denied their rights and denied their equality you have to ask yourself what are the factors that are an epidemic problem and that’s what this is.

“Injustice can never be stood for. It always must be fought against and I just was sick of it being a problem,” Heard said, adding, “I personally think that if you deny something or if you hide something you’re inadvertently admitting it’s wrong. I don’t feel like I’m wrong.”

As for van Ree? “She’s so beautiful. I mean, you’d have to be crazy not to want to go out with her!”

We have no problem with this gorgeous girl being a lesbian, as long as we can watch.

Props to her for enjoying the taste of the ‘gina and looking like the type of lesbian that the porn industry has spent years selling us. Justin Bieber will be a happy little girl knowing she now has a chance with Amber.

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Uber hottie Amber Heard who you’ll know from films like Zombieland and Pineapple Express and who will soon appear as Jonny Depp’s love interest in ‘The Rum Diaries,’ just came out of the closet with her girlfriend, photographer Tasya van Ree, whom she has been carpet munching with since 2008.
 

Guy Ritchie got it right this time

article-0-092F99E6000005DC-849_224x655Guy Ritchie has finally moved on from creatures who crawl out of their mausoleums at night to bench press army tanks and on to a 21-year old supermodel who will keep him young by virtue of her breasts still being alive…and mainly vein free. Said supermodel is Slovakian Michaela Kocianová and the two met when Guy Ritchie was directing her in a perfume campaign for Christian Dior alongside Jude Law. Now, we haven’t seen the final product, but we’re willing to bet that by the end of it Michaela’s breasts were fused with Jude Law’s chin…and his mustache…and his balding spots. Ok, so she pretty much overtook his entire head. See? He’s making better movies as we speak.