Archive for the "Janice Dickinson" Category

Leave It To The Professionals: Celebrity Shade That Didn’t Go Over Too Well

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What were these celebrities thinking when they made these silly comments?

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Janice Dickinson celebrates the 4th of July

The world’s first supermodel has definitely seen better days. I have to give her serious credit for looking as good as she does in a bikini and for having the balls to wear a bikini at 56 years old, but I’m not entirely sure this is something the world needs to see. I love her patriotism though. As she’s seen celebrating the 4th of July on a beach in Malibu, Janice doesn’t exactly look like a woman that’s knocking on 60′s door, but she doesn’t look far from it either. It’s one of those weird situations where you look at the pictures and think, “Holy cow! I can’t believe she’s almost sixty. Well….” and then you trail off uncomfortably admitting, without actually saying, that yeah, you can kind of see it. Still a gutsy move from a woman known for being bold and outrageous.

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Just One Pic: Janice Dickinson

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Here’s the self-proclaimed “world’s first supermodel” Janice Dickinson striking the perfect pose for the cameras as she leaves the Vivienne Westwood show during London Fashion Week. And don’t you dare call her dimwitted. She’s just a former supermodel with some serious issues... with the entire world!

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And now for your daily eye assault

41609PCN_JaniceHere’s Janice Dickinson on her way to Soho House in West Hollywood looking more and more like Steven Tyler had drunken sex with a tiger, had a baby and raised it in a Port-a-john. And they named it Freakomodo. Because Quasimodo was already taken. Because we love you.

 

Janice Dickinson finds a new man. Who’s willing to accept contact without 100 dollar bills involved

article-0-09D709F1000005DC-764_468x590Here’s Janice Dickinson in Malibu beach this weekend looking her usual Steven Tyler/melted cheese sexy rubbing dead skin with a younger, mystery man. Janice was not seen carrying around a plastic bag full of cash to throw at him each time she got the urge to assault his lips and the guy was upright and walking so we can rule out roofies, which leaves us only with one possibility. CIA sent this man to establish contact, make the THING love it and then kill IT. Someone still cares for this country, damn it!

 

‘Girls Gone Wild’ creator Joe Francis gets teenage girls to get naked in uncensored new reality show

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There’s another beauty-based reality show getting ready to launch this week. And like so many of its predecessors, it will feature a group of attractive celebrity hopefuls. A passel of pretty gals will be taking photos in exotic locations as they compete to be crowned “The Hottest Girl in America.”

But this is no “America’s Next Top Model” or “The Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency” – this is a completely uncensored, inside look at Joe Francis’s controversial franchise “Girls Gone Wild.” GGW is known for trolling beaches, colleges and clubs frequented by young women and videotaping their (usually inebriated) targets exposing themselves — in exchange for a cap or a t-shirt.

This new “un-rated” 12-part, half-hour reality series, entitled “Search for the Hottest Girl in America,” will air in the 1 a.m ET/10 p.m. PT slot on Dallas Mavericks owner Mark Cuban’s HDNet channel. The independent network is generally included automatically in HD packages with leading providers such as Comcast, DirecTV, Dish Network and Verizon. In fact, it’s not even a pay-to-order station like HBO or Showtime.

But is this new reality show essentially a graphic porn company masquerading as a cool, youth-orientated brand?

“Parents beware- ‘The Hottest Girl in America’ show is yet another sexually exploitative show that entices teenage girls and young women to bare all and behave provocatively in order to be featured on the show and potentially win the show’s title role,” said Donna Rice Hughes, President and Chairman of Enough is Enough, an organization that seeks to protect children from inappropriate websites and viewing content. “This show, in the same vein as its equally inappropriate predecessor ‘Girls Gone Wild,’ gets girls to imitate porn stars, strippers and pole dancers, cheered on by scores of hungry, horny boys. Not only does this send a destructive message to girls that this is the way to get noticed—both by the opposite sex and a large viewing audience—but it also sends the message to boys and girls that a female’s value is based on her body and sexual appeal and little else.”

But Francis argues that the reality show is suited to a “mature audience” – although an edited version will also be made available for a “run on all stations” and will be acceptable for all time periods and all viewers.

“The show is by no means anything harder than anything that’s been on HBO. Cuban has brilliantly designed this programming block, what he’s done is taken HBO’s whole niche and made it for free. You get HDNet as part of your basic cable package,” Francis told us. “’Girls Gone Wild’ has been demonized for all these years, it’s been made out to be controversial when in fact HBO has ten times the harder core stuff and Cinemax is what we call “Skin”emax. Mark (Cuban) is genius and taken it into the free market.”

The show is not marked as being “adult-themed” on HDNet’s schedule, although the teaser trailer has been deemed “not appropriate for work.”

A rep from HDNet confirmed that the show will run uncensored in the overnight programming block, and any airings after midnight EDT do not require warnings.

Francis said thousands of girls submitted videos and pictures in the hope of being “discovered” for the reality series, but only one “lucky” lady (as determined by viewer voting) will become his next hot property. And apparently, we’re all going to be surprised that there is more to Francis’s company than just drunk, naked 19-year-olds.

“In all the focus groups it actually scored higher with women than men. You’re going to be surprised; it’s not what you’d expect. It has every element of our GGW brand in it, the gratuitous nudity all over it and all uncensored, but it’s an incredible look at the company on all levels – it is a great story line with great characters,” Francis said.

But according to the Parents Television Council, for GGW to market themselves as anything other than a porn-based company they are is appalling.

“GGW has built its brand on the exploitation of intoxicated women, that’s just what they are and for them to pretend to be anything but that is quite frankly, sickening. This (new show) further demonstrates the need for people to have cable choice,” Dan Isett, Director of Public Policy at the Parents Television Council Director told Pop Tarts. “People should have the opportunity to pay for it individually and not have it part of their basic package. I would caution advertisers to be prepared for a public reaction if they were to advertise on programs like that, they have a responsibility for the programming. These advertisers ultimately pay for it and should be held accountable for a show like that.”

 

Lindsay Lohan’s breasts are done saving Haiti

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Lindsay Lohan spent a few days in London last week saving Haiti with her collagen lips and bucket of vodka puke she shared with Janice Dickinson (the two bonded over a long talk of how to tackle excess labia skin), but was back on American soil for the weekend to host?? an event at The Pool At Harrad’s in Atlantic City which she used to promote her leggings line…or her breasts. Or maybe the breasts were promoting the leggings. Either way, it worked, because we have the urge to weep out a fiver and buy a pair. Now if we could only figure out where to insert the bill…

 

Janice Dickinson helps Haiti by allowing her silicone to be used as window sealant in rebuilted houses

FP_IMAGE_4544857/FP_SET_4543711Here’s Janice Dickinson looking like Steven Tyler had a death-match with Nosferatu in a time capsule and came back conjoined, offering her auto parts in an auction to help Haiti (worth mentioning the event was put together by Lindsay Lohan so it is plausible they came out of the fundraiser with a pallet of coke ready to be shipped to Haiti to feed the hungry children).

Granted, Janice is a helping soul since history books mention president Wilson dispatching her in 1917 to help the troops fight the Germans in WWI, but a century has passed since, and the only way she can help raise money these days is by standing in the middle of the room with her skirt lifted up and E.T threatening to fall out, until the charity guests lose all will to live and hand their wallets over. And if that doesn’t work on everyone, roofies will take care of the resilient few.

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Janice Dickinson tries to suck the inner-life out of young, unsuspicious boyfriend

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Janice Dickinson was coming out of Barney’s in LA on Christmas Eve and like the ghoulish hound that she is, she caught whiff of cameras being within a one-mile radius from her, so she decided to show everyone how she stays alive from a day to day basis. And that is by turning into a giant leech and sucking the living cells out of unsuspecting young things. Fortunately for her 32-year old boyfriend Alex Abdalla is a firefighter, so he’s inhaled enough carbon monoxide to make him impervious to large doses of poisonous saliva…which explains the fact that this one didn’t turn into a pile of ashes and osteoarthritic bones 60 seconds later.

FYI, moments after the grotesque display, Janice grabbed her boy-toy and proceeded to dry-hump him, for which she received three dollars. Yes, it was all a very classy affair on the eve of Jesus birth…

 

Janice Dickinson makes war veteran cry…for all the wrong reasons

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Janice Dickinson was keen on showing her Veteran Day’s spirit on Wednesday when she hugged a female war veteran who was not wearing her bulletproof vest. The tough as nails soldier broke down in sobs, unable to endure the sharp, knife-like pain inflicted on her ribs by Janice’s titanium pokies. Coupled with Janice’s booze breath and the fact that she was inches from the woman’s face without her war mask on, we’re willing to bet the soldier was later taken in to be treated for severe Post Stress Syndrome…darn it, it’s Iraq all over again for this one.

Photos: Pacific Coast News

 

WOOF! Janice Dickinson looks rough

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Janice Dickinson is back from her stint as a Costa Rican castaway on “I’m a Celebrity…Get Me Out of Here!” The usually cantankerous supermodel was in a cheery mood for once as she smiled and popped some nipple pokies for the photographers. She’s probably so happy because she no longer has to live in a hut with other D-list celebs and she can finally take a poo in a proper toilet. But all that smiling can’t distract from that fact that Janice is basically a saggy sack full of bones with a pair of water wings shoved under her chest. Woman, you are off the island now! You are no longer subject to coconut rations. Eat something!

 

Janice Dickinson Renames Show: “I’m A Celebrity…Get Me to the Hospital!”


The show might be about a bunch of D-Listed celebrities (and even no celebrities at all) living on next to nothing in the jungle. And we all agree that although Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag were the biggest screw ups on the show, we doubt they can top the beauty that is Janice Dickinson. Just like Heidi, Janice found herself in the hospital from the harsh realities of the TV program. No botox for WEEKS!...
 

Victoria Beckham and her renewed set of mammaries

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Not to admit to being the Nostradamus of gossip, but having seen more surgically enhanced mammaries than a Beverly Hills doctor will ever get to grope and examine (ok, maybe not in their 3-D version), we did declare Victoria Beckham had gotten a 3rd boob job when we saw pictures of her in a see-through shirt just last week (they looked like a penis with a 24/7 erection).

So we thought we take a trip down memory lane…our way of paying tribute to Victoria Beckham’s implants…many of which now lie as hazardous waste in surgical bins.

Ex-Spice Girl Victoria had her first boob job in 1999, when a London clinic increased her bust from its natural size of 34A to 34D.

Further surgery two years later took her to a 34DD(she also had capsular contracture which made them look harder than her hubby’s football).

However, gravity affects everything…even plastic hiding under muscle. And so, faced with saggy boobs (see pic 4), Victoria visited a Los Angeles plastic surgeon to have the DDs removed and replaced with 34Bs…which is nutty because it’s like driving a Mercedes and then downsizing to a Mini Cooper…or like having penis enlargement and then deciding to give it the masculine quality of your pinkie by basically chopping it off…

British tabloid The Sun claims that Victoria took the implants out all together, which, from what the latest picture shows, there is no way in hell. Calling upon our expertise once again, we’d have to say that as she got older and thinner, the fat around the implants disappeard and to deal with the appearance of ripples (if you ever saw pictures of a drunk Janice Dickinson with her boobs hanging out, then you’d know what we’re talking about) she had to downsize and lift ( in this case the surgeon did it a bit overenthusiastically and as a result her chest is now a miniature of the Buckingham palace with its two guards at the gates always standing at attention).

A source of the tabloid said: “Victoria has wanted her implants taken out for a while. She felt that was part of her old WAG image - the big hair, big boobs, fake tan - and that she has moved on since those days.

“She had the op three weeks ago and is very pleased with the results. After the op she came to London for business then went to France to heal properly in private.”

 

Never a Dull Moment with Heidi Montag & Spencer Pratt


We hope you all have been watching that gem of a show I'm A Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here. If you haven't and you're in the mood to laugh your butts off, then turn on NBC every night to see D-list celebrities survive in the jungle. And of course Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt have graced us with their presences and OF COURSE Heidi somehow ended up in the hospital. To warn you before viewing, Janice Dickinson's face alone will scare the crap out of you, but it's worth it...
 

Janice Dickinson is Wasted, Half Naked


Supermodel and America's Top Model Judge are just a few of the bullets listed on Janice Dickinson's resume. Now, Dickinson can add Weekend Drunk and Street Hooker to her Achievements and Extra Curricular activities. Moments after leaving Nobu in West Hollywood, a drunk Dickinson showed off her Honors while exhibiting her unsatisfactory oral...
 

Janice Dickinson’s drunken breast ripples attack paparazzo(video)

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We don’t know what’s scarier about Janice Dickinson anymore. Her mouth (migrating like a bloated bird towards her chin), what comes out of her mouth (mean gibberish both when sober and severely intoxicated) or her implants (one of which is trying to come out through her pores…or nipple…you never know, it might erupt like Vesuvius and pop that nipple out like a champagne cork).

An intensely drunk Janice went jungle-mad at a cameraman on her way out of Nobu (slurring quite a few profanities), and proceeded to cause him great damage with her scarf (the damage was more mental…the guy had a close up with her breast ripples and is still recovering at the psychiatric ward).

She then got into her car and attempted to drive away, but realized she was still pissed off. When she came out to shoot the guy with her scarf once again, a friend took over and got behind the wheel. Janice’s last great words as she screamed them to everybody were:“I’m totally f*%ked up!”

Here’s the video…and close-ups of her breast ripples (Warning: only for those who haven’t yet had their breakfast).