Archive for the "Kirstie Alley" Category

Someone Please Hire Kirstie Alley!

Kirstie Alley is desperately looking for a job, and the search is getting pretty ugly. You will not believe which show she is begging to get on now.

If you want to read all of the sad details, then click on the following link.

God Bless her! Someone Please Hire Kirstie Alley! Someone Please Hire Kirstie Alley! Someone Please Hire Kirstie Alley!


Thursday’s Miscellaneous Junk You Might Like (10.20.2011)

Amber Rose is apparently alive and Hip-Hop’s muse. Does that mean rappers get inspired to write beautiful and lyrical music when they bang her?

Kirstie Alley holding hands with her dancing partner at a Parisian cemetery. Can we assume chubby sex ensued?

Miranda Kerr poses with her the $2.5million bra she will wear at the upcoming Victoria’s Secret show.

JWoww just ruined Halloween. Or at the very least gave it Chlamydia.

Mathew Perry is looking great these days.

Chaz Bono exits vehicles with poise and elegance.

Ashley Tisdale’s gardener fancies you.

Mina Suvari wears a grown-up T-shirt to go with her new grown-up hair.

Anne Robinson is The Weakest Link in the circle i call “Women I find remotely attractive”.

Amber Rose in lingerie on cover of Inked magazine Amber Rose with a gem in her mouth on the cover of Urban Ink magazine article-0-0E71A4D300000578-150_468x528 article-2051145-0E71A55400000578-453_468x395 article-2051145-0E71FFCA00000578-99_468x582 article-2051145-0E7202CF00000578-124_224x589 article-2051145-0E72024B00000578-343_468x286 article-2051145-0E72014100000578-464_224x589 article-2051069-0E71977E00000578-776_468x834 article-2051069-0E71B68600000578-252_468x712 article-2051069-0E71949000000578-615_224x701 article-0-0E7278C200000578-131_634x931 article-0-0E7277BE00000578-452_634x706 article-0-0E7278B700000578-961_634x749 article-2050861-0E6FC98100000578-575_468x712 article-2050861-0E6FC99100000578-783_224x423 the-crap-we-missed-1019-08-480x720 the-crap-we-missed-1019-11-480x720 article-2050933-0E6EE2E100000578-127_224x696 article-2050933-0E6EE10900000578-1_224x696 article-2050933-0E6EE55900000578-858_468x864 article-2050664-0E6E344E00000578-214_634x912 article-2050664-0E6E35DE00000578-634_634x987 article-2050664-0E6E348500000578-780_306x520

Kirstie Alley’s Partner Stumbles & Drops Her on Dancing With the Stars

Here I thought the MAGIC of Scientology enabled people to levitate.

Kirstie Alley started off this season of Dancing* with the Stars in surprisingly strong fashion. On tonight’s live performance show, however, the 60-year-old took an embarrassing tumble after partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy’s leg gave out from under her. He had to know he was playing with dynamite when he took Kirstie Alley as a partner, and last night his hubris finally cost him. His leg basically exploded while attempting to drag Kirstie across the stage. Had he bothered to button up his damn shirt, he could have hidden a back belt or something under there.

I’m surprised there wasn’t a tsunami wave of laminated wood that took out the first couple rows of the audience.

*It isn’t dancing so much as orbiting around her gravitational pull.


Kirstie Alley’s 17-Year-Old Son Is Engaged

During a recent taping of The Ellen DeGeneres Show, actress Kirstie Alley revealed some exciting news – her 17-year-old son, William True, is engaged!

The 59-year-old diet pitchwoman/reality star tells Ellen that True and his girlfriend have been dating for about a year and that she is absolutely fine with their plans.

“I feel good because they’re really in love. True’s very… he’s got a level head. He’s a good guy,” says Kirstie. “He's very monogamous and he's very sweet with her.”

Admitting that marrying young doesn’t always work out, she adds that waiting to tie the knot doesn’t guarantee a successful marriage either:

You know, I was married when I was just 19 years old and that didn't work. Then I was married when I was 30 years old and that's when everyone said you should get married and that didn't work. So, I don't think I'm an expert on the subject.

Adds Kirstie, “I think if somebody's in love and wants to be married then let them be in love and get married.”

The former Cheers star is also mom to 15-year-old Lillie Price.


Kirstie Alley Opens Up About Life & Love

Actress Kirstie Alley, 59, has spent much of her life on the big and small screen, starring in hits like Look Whos Talking, and the much loved sitcom Cheers. More recently the mom-of-two has found herself thrust into the spotlight less for her acting ability, and more for her weight ups and downs. In an interview with Ladies Home Journal, Alley opens up about the public fascination with her weight, her love for her family and friends, her commitment to Scientology, and why she loves Twitter.

How suffering a miscarriage triggered weight gain in the 80's: "It was the first time I ever gained weight. I went from 118 to around 135 and the press began talking, which was weird because I was still thin."


Kirstie Alley Says Scientology Makes Parenting Easier

Former Cheers star Kirstie Alley is headed back to the small screen, only this time the mom-of-two will be playing herself. The 59-year-old actress - and her kids William, 17, and Lillie, 15 - are featured in the new A&E reality show Kristie's Big Life, which aims to document her struggle to slim down. Kristie recently chatted to Babble about her parenting philosophy, her famous friend John Travolta and her thoughts on Scientology.

On her biggest parenting challenges: "It hasn’t been particularly challenging. That’s probably where scientology helps a family, because as scientologists we’re taught that you are responsible for what’s going on in your life. And that’s great because kids - especially teenagers - have secrets that they don’t feel like they can tell you. In scientology, we learn to make a space safe for our kids to tell us anything so that the kid knows that he’s not going to get nailed when he tells you. If the kid doesn’t [feel safe], they’ll just draw away from you. So with my kids, sooner or later they’ll come to me and say, 'I smoked a cigarette or I did this…' And I have to bite my tongue and say, 'Okay, I’m glad you told me that' because I am. It keeps you close. So challenge-wise, sometimes my son is a little too brutally honest and it’s too much information, but I’d rather have that than the opposite."


Kirstie Alley & Her Premiere Pals

Cheers star Kirstie Alley and her two children - William, 17, and Lillie, 15 - were photographed at the premiere of The Runaways in New York City on Wednesday (March 17).

While promoting her new reality TV show, Kirstie Alley's Big Life, the 59-year-old actress - who has been involved in Scientology for the past 30 years - was blindsided on the Today show this week with a question about whether her new weight-loss program is connected to her religious beliefs.

That I would need to clarify or defend the intentions or affiliations of my LLC business corporation in the year 2010 is indicative of the intolerances that we as a country still need to overcome," Alley said Wednesday. "However, after the Today show brought fringe bigotry and intolerance into the forefront of the national media I feel compelled to clarify [myself]."

Kirstie Alley's Big Life premieres on A&E on March 21.


Kate Moss’s pubic hair in Love Magazine


We all know that a photo shoot showcasing Kate Moss’s breasts would be as exciting as watching your grandma knit you a cable sweater since that’s all she does in between breaks from drunk vomiting in her 60 year-old boyfriend’s lap, so Love Magazine thought it prudent to ape the ante by a few notches. And by a few notches we mean taking pictures of her pubic hair mainly encased in a chastity belt. Which is of course as ridiculous as putting a virginity ring on George Michael after pulling an all-nighter raiding as many bathroom stalls in the greater L.A area as possible.

Moss was only one of the eight covers Love Magazine printed for its latest issue. Naomi Campbell and Amber Valletta were among the eight models pictured in the same pose (and with their measurements outlined) in an effort by the magazine to show that beauty comes in different sizes. Errr, unless Kirstie Alley’s ass was all over one of the covers trying to replicate what strobe lights do to epileptics through print form, that’s not the message we got, Love magazine. Just throwing it out there, because we’re sticklers for accuracy and a clearly defined purpose in journalism.


John Travolta wants to save Haiti with his army of Scientology touch healers


John Travolta piloted his private Boeing 707 to Haiti’s capital, Port-Au-Prince yesterday to bring relief to its people with aid supplies and a group of yellow t-shirt-wearing Scientology “ministers”. And while his ready-to-eat military rations and medical supplies will come in handy, going around touching people and attempting to cure their infections and gangrene by channeling Ron Hubbard is at best ridiculous.

If John Travolta really wanted to help Haiti he would have brought Kirstie Alley with him. At 500lbs and counting, she could have easily pretended to be Hercules and lift pillars and stones underneath which many Haitians are trapped. And who knows? If some of the victims happen to be young, virile men who are wounded AND naked, maybe Tom Cruise could also jump in and drag them out of their holes (especially those trapped in really tiny spaces). Now that’s a superpower of a team right there.

Here’s what these “assists” are performing:

“Locational Assists”: After traumas, people sometime’s forget where they are maybe? To remind earthquake victims that they are still stuck in Haiti, volunteer ministers will be performing this vital medical procedure, quoted here verbatim from the Scientology Handbook:

5. Continue giving the command, directing the person’s attention to different objects in the environment. Be sure to acknowledge the person each time after he has complied.
For instance, you say, “Look at that tree.” “Thank you.” “Look at that building.” “Good.” “Look at that street.” “All right.” “Look at that lawn.” “Very good.” You point each time to the object.
6. Keep this up until the person has good indicators and a cognition. You can end the assist at this point. Tell the person, “End of assist.”

Travolta’s aid delivery, including six tonnes of ready-to-eat military rations and medical supplies, came as impatience with food distribution sparked a small riot in front of the national palace and President René Préval announced he would move into a tent in solidarity with hundreds of thousands left homeless by the quake.


Kirstie Alley & Her Katsuya Kids

Kirstie Alley and her two children - William, 17, and Lillie, 15 - were photographed at Katsuya restaurant in Hollywood on Thursday (January 14). The kids' father is Kirstie's ex-husband, fellow actor Parker Stevenson.

The 59-year-old Cheers alum is venturing into the realm of social networking with the launch of, a Twitter-like community dedicated to helping people share tips on weight loss, dieting, fitness, exercise and living a healthy lifestyle. Alley has been publicly battling her weight gain over the past few years.


Oh no! The Jordan “Slut-o-fest” has come to an end


Jordan is back to London and back to being sensible…which translates to wearing a shirt and pants and getting back on her Hepatitis meds (kidding, she doesn’t have Hepatitis…just herpes…and gonnorhea). Seriously, how on earth are we going to be able to find another slut mommy with an appetite for weekly orgies bigger than Kirstie Alley’s appetite to eat all the caged animals at the Los Angeles Zoo to make fun of?

And because we know we won’t be able to find a replacement so quickly, here are some of the remains of Jordan’s days in Ibiza. 1) Jordan remembers she hasn’t seen her belly button in years and decides to give a shout-out (by cupping her funbags and parting them like Moses parted the Red Sea). 2) Jordan goes shopping in full shopping attire…why someone would go through the trouble of inventing dressing rooms is beyond her…