Archive for the "Miami" Category

More Carter Family Preciousness: King Bey Finally Lets Princess Blue Ivy’s Party Pics Out The Vault! [Photos]

Beyonce Blue Ivy Birthday

Thanks Beyoncé! We know you wanted to see her secret stash of pictures from Blue and Mama Tina’s birthdays.

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We’re only halfway through January and the Carter family has been very busy, so we’re glad Bey finally got around to putting up some real treasures on her Tumblr. We’ve got over 40 photos for your viewing pleasure and guess who got her hair combed for the occasion!?

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Watch the WrestleMania 28 Press Conference from Miami Florida Replay

 

Rita Rusic Looking Sexy in Tiny Bikini!

If we told you that there was a 51-year-old in a tiny red bikini on the beach, you probably wouldn’t think much of it. However, Rita Rusic is no ordinary 51-year-old; she is a smoking hot 51-year-old. One who is still very much in shape; just take a look at the photos below. You’d hit that, don’t lie.

The Italian movie producer has been hanging out at the beach down in Miami for the past few days. She has been seen hanging out with a man who looks to be a little younger than her. With her body, we are sure that she could get just about any man she wants. You can see her hands clasped around the mystery man’s neck, with a very nice ring on her finger. The ring just so happens to be designed by Nicole Richie from her House of Harlow range.

It’s good seeing a hottie supporting another hottie. They have to stick together; it’s a tough world out there. Rita Rusic Looking Sexy in Tiny Bikini! Rita Rusic Looking Sexy in Tiny Bikini! Rita Rusic Looking Sexy in Tiny Bikini! Rita Rusic Looking Sexy in Tiny Bikini! Rita Rusic Looking Sexy in Tiny Bikini!

 

Chris Brown Accused of Drive-By Robbery! Warrant Coming Soon

Just when things start to look up for Chris Brown…they come crashing back down again. Chris Brown has been accused of angrily snatching a girl’s iPhone outside a nightclub in Miami this weekend — and taking off with it!

Miami Beach Police confirm that an incident report was filed and the Florida State Attorney’s Office is preparing a warrant for Brown’s arrest on suspicion of “robbery by sudden snatching.” Christal Spann is the woman who filed the police report. She claims that she followed Chris out of the nightclub early in the morning and snapped a picture of Chris getting into his Bentley. She told cops that Chris flipped out when he saw her camera phone — then grabbed it through the car window, saying: “Bitch, you ain’t going to put that on no website.”

Really Chris? You’re going to risk going to jail again because someone took a picture of you? We always knew you were a douche, but we thought you at least had some common sense.

Brown is still on probation for the Rihanna beat down and if he’s arrested he could be thrown in jail on a probation violation. It’s also being reported that the L.A. District Attorney’s Office is aware of the robbery and they are waiting on the L.A. County Probation Dept. to recommend what action to take.

If officials determine the allegations are true, then his probation could be revoked and he could go to prison for 4 years! Chris Brown Accused of Drive-By Robbery! Warrant Coming Soon Chris Brown Accused of Drive-By Robbery! Warrant Coming Soon Chris Brown Accused of Drive-By Robbery! Warrant Coming Soon Chris Brown Accused of Drive-By Robbery! Warrant Coming Soon

 

Serena Williams looks Beefy in Bikini

Serena spent Christmas in…….Miami! You guessed it, I am pretty sure every single celebrity went to Miami for Christmas. Anyway, she not only went to Miami, she went to Miami on a mission to make everyone look at her oddly shaped body. You can see her in the pictures below, she’s in a very odd looking bikini and it only covers up about a quarter of her ass. Normally that is a good thing! The more ass the better, but not in this case. It doesn’t even look like an ass; it looks a pillow filled with cement. Her whole body looks hard and uncomfortable. Even her boobs look like they could crush a beer can, it’s just freaky! I know some people find Serena hot, and I applaud you for being so brave. It truly takes a real man to admit he likes Serena Williams. I was going to include her in the “Spank Bank” for later today, but I just couldn’t do it after the Richard Simmons joke yesterday. I figured that would just be too much for everyone. Enjoy these pictures as much as you can! I am going to go in the corner and suck on my thumb ‘til the scary images get out of my head.
 

The Spank Bank for 12/24/11

Well, it’s Christmas Eve but that doesn’t mean the sexy train stops! You still need your spank bank material, I understand. First up… Claudia Galanti: She is a model (of course) aren’t they all models? Anyway, you can see her having fun on the beach in Miami in a tiny bikini. It’s currently in the 30s and raining where I am, so these pictures are a double slap of jealousy. Zoe Kravitz: I didn’t realize Lenny Kravitz had a daughter this hot. Zoe was also in Miami (what the heck!) with her boyfriend Penn Badgley, you know the dude who was once banging Blake Lively. So, clearly his life is made. TOWIE: I’ve never heard of this show or watched it because…well it’s a British dramality show and I have no way to watch that. Which is pretty sad because the stars of this show look pretty damn hot. They are all dressed up in their slutty Christmas outfits. Alison Brie: Since it is Christmas Eve, I have decided to share something special with you all. I have a huge crush on Alison Brie and it probably has a lot to do with all the incredibly hot GIFS of her. Enjoy my favorites below…  
 

Adrianna Lima MILFs Around in a Bikini

Victoria’s Secret super model, Adriana Lima, enjoyed a day of sun and surf in South Beach in Miami yesterday, and annoyingly decided do bring her bikini-picture-ruining daughter along with her, because apparently brown babies are the hottest accessory this summer. Second hand stores are going to be overflowing with them next year.

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Ciara Looks Great in a Bikini

Singer Ciara took a dip in the ocean in Miami, in a small pink bikini showing off her curves on Monday. Ciara recently performed a concert in Miami as part of the Malibu Radio Maliboom Boom Station Invasion tour that will now be traveling to Virginia Beach followed by many other cities…Wait, you people don’t give a shit about the details. TITS PEOPLE, TITS!

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Jaime King Doing Bikini Related Stuff

Jaime King was in Miami over the weekend with her husband, producer Kyle Newman, showing off her Batman villainess hips to body ratio, and her fugly bikini that she must have made by time-traveling to the 1970s and stealing the curtains from a pediatrician’s office.

Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini Jaime King in a Bikini
 

Maria Menounos Looking Sexy in a Bikini

This is something we can all truly appreciate; Greek Goddess Maria Menounos and her sweet little body in a bikini on Miami beach over the weekend. I wonder if she dates celebrity bloggers. Who am I kidding, nobody dates bloggers. That’s alright though, we don’t need to date, I’m perfectly fine with just a sexual relationship if that’s more her style. I’m a big boy. I shouldn’t say that, I’m an average size boy. Call me.
Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body Maria Menounos Shows Off Her Bikini Body
 

Rachel Uchitel in a Bikini & Making Out With Some Dude

Here is Rachel Uchitel enjoying the sun in Miami with some nameless guy, what these images don’t show is Tiger jacking off right behind them.

That face. Those puffy lips. Those big veneered teeth. Those fake inflated tits. That orange skin. That constant shameless self-promotion. Everything about her screams “class.” She must give some seriously good head because I wouldn’t have gave up Elin for that. What the hell did Tiger do in the bedroom that required him to pay her off? Dirty Sanchez, midget orgy?

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Kathy Griffin Dances Topless by a Road in Miami

There are many celebrities who we expect to see tweeting topless photos of themselves. Kathy Griffin is not one of them. As the sun began to rise over the sandy shores of Miami Beach, passersby on the waterfront got to see something they’ve probably never seen before… Kathy Griffin’s knockers!

For some reason unknown to us (though we imagine it was for attention), the reality star and comedienne walked out onto the dock of a waterfront home clad in nothing more than a bikini bottom. With her 50 year old itty bitty titties flopping about.

Kathy tweeted the pictures herself, but shortly after she (or TwitPic) deleted the photos… but, this being the internet and all, it was archived by many pervs all around the globe before it was removed from TwitPic.

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Brooklyn Decker & Her Boobs are Still in a Bikini

Brooklyn Decker spent a second day down in Miami and a second day in a bikini, this time poolside at the Ritz-Carlton hotel. Some paparazzi fella was nice enough to snap these pictures of her and her big plump breasts doing their thing together, hanging out, sun tanning, jiggling nicely in the sunshine while she walks around… You know, the usual things hot chicks do with their breasts at the pool. Although, I don’t see any shots of her applying suntan lotion onto those things… What a shame.

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JWoww Poolside in a Bikini

Jersey Shore “star”, JWoww, was seen testing the tensile strength of yet another bikini in Miami over the weekend. We hear NASA are working on a polymer that might someday properly contain her tits, but it could be decades.

Now excuse me, I gotta go clean myself, because I just JWowed in my boxers.

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Brooklyn Decker & Her Boobs in a Bikini

Here’s Sports Illlustrated hottie and Victoria’s Secret model, Brooklyn Decker, in Miami over the weekend chilling at some beach with those fat breasts that have made her so popular with the dudes who design bikinis for a living (and the dudes who look at her in bikinis for a living, as in me). I didn’t even know supermodels were allowed to have breasts that large, I like it, tell all the other girls to get on board with this new look, I’ll pay for the surgery. What bugs me though is while I was busy jerking it to these pictures I heard someone complain about her new haircut looking pretty shitty, all I can say to that is…. THERE IS HAIR IN THIS PICTURE?!?

Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body Brooklyn Decker Rocks her Bikini Body
 

JWoww and her Fake Tits in a Bikini

JWoww seems to have spent all last week taking a vacation from her arduous life of being filmed on vacation because here she is in Miami, in a bikini, on a vacation. Just look at her expression as she admires her huge implants. She just looks so pleased, so proud, she’s practically beaming. Or it could just be those roofies someone slipped her 5 minutes prior to these pictures.

Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami Jenni "JWOWW" Farley in a Bikini in Miami
 

Chloe Sevigny is in a Bikini and Has Itchy Arms

Here’s Chloe Sevigny showing off her assets in a little bikini on South Beach in Miami recently. Now I know what you are thinking “she’s just a normal, average looking woman who happens to be an actress, nothing wrong or particular­ly interestin­g either way.” Well what makes  Chloe stick out from the rest is that she is freaky enough to gobble down on a dick and swallow on camera for the world to see. No joke. She sucked off some guy and swallowed his load in the movie The Brown Bunny, which is something I admire in actresses.

You can see what the hell I’m talking about right here… Obviously it’s not safe for work since it’s a sexy time video.

You just know the guy getting the knobber in that movie kept flubbing his lines intentionally so he would have to re-shoot, so to speak.

Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini Chloe Sevigny on a Beach in a Bikini

Here’s Chloe Sevigny showing off her assets in a little bikini on South Beach in Miami, Florida on New Year’s Eve

 

Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez, Sitting in a Tree…

You know that lesbian kid with the hair and that girl from that show your niece watches (no not Dora the explorer, that other one), well they must be dating because they were seen together a few different times in Miami. Ancient law dictates that since they were spotted eating at an iHop the other day and now walking around South Beach, they are now bound together for eternity. I generally dig watching lesbians, but I just can’t get into these two.

And no, speculating about the romantic lives of children is not weird at all.

Here is the real question: What is Disney’s profit margin on the Gomez-Bieber relationship? Because clearly this would never happen without Mickey and Donald giving the order.

Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating Justin Bieber & Selena Gomez Are Probably Dating
 

Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini

Christ, it’s been a shitty couple of weeks for bikini pictures, guess because the world seems to have frozen over, nothing but stories on the News about people being snowed into their homes and eating their pets and newborn children to stay alive. So thank God someone finally put a bikini on. Unfortunately none of you know who Kelly Bensimon is because she’s on The Real Housewives of New York which exactly seventeen people watch.

Well I decided to spend 2 minutes Googling her to at least get some semi-interesting info on her, and it actually turns out she’s single… Which makes the show one big, gigantic lie solely made to toy with your emotions. Which is great. Now where are we supposed to learn about constantly bikini-clad gold-digging whor…..Oh, right, the Kardashians.

Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini Real Housewive Kelly Bensimon in a Bikini
 

Brooke Hogan Wearing a Bikini in Miami

At first glance I thought “That guy has great tits”, but then i realised it was Brooke Hogan, who  has been giving her Twitter followers daily updates as she committed herself to a grueling regime of twice-daily workouts in an effort to look less like Hulk I’d imagine, both her father and the green one. Well to be nice Brooke decided to share the result with the masses, posing in a little red bikini on a Miami beach for some canned photo shoot.

It just seems as long as there are no normal sized humans next to her for comparison, she looks great.

Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini Brooke Hogan in a Bikini