Archive for the "Tiger Woods" Category

Celebs Who Had Affairs With Their Nannies, Body Guards, And Other Employees

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These stars got a little more “help” than is part of the job description from their household staff and employees.

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Swirl Problems: Tiger Woods Snow Bunny Boo Lindsey Vonn Is Shook Newly Divorced Rachel Uchitel Will Steal Him!

Tiger Woods Lindsey Vonn Rachel Uchitel

Is Cheetah Woods about to start creepin’ out on his new becky with his old sidepiece Rachel “You Can Tell I’m A Ho” Uchitel?

According to National Enquirer reports:

WITH Tiger Woods’ ex-mistress Rachel Uchitel back on the market, his new squeeze Lindsey Vonn fears their ro­mance is doomed.

Sources say ski champ Lindsey – who recently bowed out of the up­coming Winter Olympics – is terrified that newly divorced Rachel will once again set her sights on the skirt-chas­ing golfer.

“Tiger casually told Lindsey that Rachel left a voice mail saying she’d called him for a chat. Lindsey was clearly eaten up with jealousy,” said a source, “but she was determined not to let Tiger see it. She blurted out, ‘I don’t care.’ But deep down, she was thunderstruck.”

The beautiful blonde has also been depressed over abandoning her Olym­pic dream after she failed to bounce back from a devastating crash on the slopes in 2013, said the source.

“Besides that, in the back of her mind, mind, Lindsey’s always tormented by the idea that Tiger will revert to his cheating ways,” added the source.

“Now, with Rachel back on the prowl, Lindsey worries that she’ll try to sink her claws into Tiger once again.”

As The ENQUIRER reported, 29-year-old Lindsey began pushing Tiger, 38, for a baby. Instead, just one day after she dropped out of the Olympics, the couple adopted a mixed-breed dog named Leo. Lindsey then had surgery to repair ligaments in her right knee on Jan. 15.

Meanwhile, Rachel finalized her divorce from hubby Matt Hahn on Jan. 13. Her extramarital af­fair with Tiger was exposed by The ENQUIRER in No­vember 2009 and blew up his marriage to Swedish beauty Elin Nordegren, the mother of his two young children.

The whole thing cost Tiger a fortune. He reportedly paid Rachel, 39, $10 million to keep quiet about their amo­rous antics, and he reportedly had to shell out a whopping $110 million-plus to Elin to end their six-year union.

In 2010, The ENQUIRER reported that a then-single Tiger was thinking about marrying party girl Rachel – now mom to 28-month-old daughter Wyatt – and starting a family with her.

That never happened, and the golf icon announced his romance with Lindsey in March 2013. But it’s been plagued by one problem after another, said a second source.

“They fight like cats and dogs,” said the source. “Lindsey feels like she always needs to be looking over her shoulder to make sure Tiger isn’t fooling around.

“They got into a nasty screaming match a few months ago when Tiger saw a picture of Rachel in a magazine and commented on how hot she is.

“Then, a few days after Tiger mentioned Rachel’s voice mail, Lind­sey started pestering him about his feelings for her. Tiger just laughed and told her that jealousy is a huge turn-off.

“But Lindsey expects it’s only a mat­ter of time before Tiger and Rachel hook up, and she’s left out in the cold.”

SMH… Who cares at this point. This guy has already proven himself to be grimy beyond belief. The two hoes deserve each other.

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Tiger Woods Ignores Wheelchair-Stricken Half Brother

Apparently, Tiger Woods is still too busy having sex with sluts because he won’t return any phone calls to his half-brother, Kevin Woods. Kevin is 52-years-old and was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis in 2009, he is in a wheelchair and is struggling financially. Tiger’s eldest half-brother, Earl Woods Jr. has been trying to reach Tiger on behalf of Kevin, but he never receives a call back.

“I leave messages. I leave updates on Kevin, but for whatever reason I don’t get a response. Kevin loves tiger. A call from Tiger would really pump Kevin up. When he doesn’t call, it just makes him feel worse. We haven’t asked Tiger for a dime. Not even tickets to a tournament. But Kevin’s losing his home. He needs a caregiver and he can’t have a caregiver and keep his home at the same time.” Earl Jr. told ESPN.

This story sounds a little fishy to me. It sounds like Tiger’s brothers are just money hungry. Why else would they take the story to the media? If I went to the news every time my brother didn’t call me back, well, I would be on it everyday! You need to keep family issues between the family! You don’t go around telling everyone your business.

Would it be nice of Tiger to call Kevin back and make sure he is doing okay? Sure. But we don’t know the whole story here. I bet you they have asked Tiger for money before, it’s only natural. Besides, they are only “half-brothers” do they really even count as family? Tiger Woods Ignores Wheelchair-Stricken Half Brother Tiger Woods Ignores Wheelchair-Stricken Half Brother Tiger Woods Ignores Wheelchair-Stricken Half Brother

 

Tiger Woods’ Coach Writes Shocking Tell-All!

It is no secret that Tiger Woods has a screwed up personal life. He’s got women popping up all over the place and scandal after scandal marring his used-to-be perfection. And, it seems that his constant striving for perfection may have led him down this disastrous path in the first place.

Hank Haney, Tiger’s ex-coach of six years, has written a very detailed tell-all book about Tiger’s most intimate habits and behaviors. In the book entitled The Big Miss, Haney described Tiger’s marriage with ex-wife Elin Nordegren in detail, revealing Woods’ domineering and controlling personality.

Apparently, Tiger actually ‘banned’ Erin from smiling when Tiger won, because he felt that he was ‘supposed to win.’ So, basically, why would you give a celebratory smile if it wasn’t a surprise that he won?

But, that’s not all. Haney described how Erin’s ‘smile got smaller’ the longer she and Woods were married. ‘Elin would keep her emotions under wraps whenever Tiger won,’ he wrote. ‘As life became more complicated, I thought Elin changed… She and Tiger developed a calm, almost cool relationship in front of other people, and conversations with them tended to be awkward and strained.  I never saw them argue, but they weren’t openly affectionate either.’

Haney also revealed how disrespectful Tiger was to others during he and Haney’s six years together. Tiger, even being the millionaire that he is, actually made others pay for his food. And, when he was finished eating at a restaurant, he would get up and leave whether or not the other guests were finished.

But, when he was finished eating and got up to leave, he expected his wife to follow him, whether or not she was done eating her meal. ‘When he was done – and he habitually ate fast – you were done,’ Haney explained.

Haney also described Tiger as being cheap, incredibly rude, and a porn addict. Before the Ryder Cup in 2006, Tiger shared a hotel room with Zach Johnson, an extremely devout Christian, Haney explained. When they arrived in the room, Tiger ‘immediately purchased the adult-movie 24-hour package and turned it on.’ Johnson was forced to ignore the moaning and groaning for his entire stay.

Tiger had let all of the fame and glory go to his head, Haney revealed. He pretended as if all of the media attention bothered him, calling them ‘vultures,’ yet he couldn’t hide all of his vanity. Though he said he hated it, Haney wrote that he actually loved South Park’s parody of him. A depiction where he actually called then-wife ‘a fat Swedish cow.’

Woods has commented on Haney’s book, calling it ‘one-sided’ during an interview with ESPN. He said that it was ‘unprofessional and very disappointing.’ You think he’s ever heard the saying, ‘Is that the pot calling the kettle black?’

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Rachel Uchitel in a Bikini & Making Out With Some Dude

Here is Rachel Uchitel enjoying the sun in Miami with some nameless guy, what these images don’t show is Tiger jacking off right behind them.

That face. Those puffy lips. Those big veneered teeth. Those fake inflated tits. That orange skin. That constant shameless self-promotion. Everything about her screams “class.” She must give some seriously good head because I wouldn’t have gave up Elin for that. What the hell did Tiger do in the bedroom that required him to pay her off? Dirty Sanchez, midget orgy?

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Tiger Woods is Selling His Yacht

And so, the porn star filled infidelity party comes to an end: After losing an estimated $100 million/year in endorsements and another $100 million in his divorce settlement, Tiger Woods is selling his yacht (Tiger, seriously. Buy a used yacht? What, do I look poor?!).

“Privacy,” the 155-foot vessel Tiger reportedly used as a hideaway during the fallout from his cheating scandal, is on the market for $25 million. Tiger is replacing Privacy with a $3.1-million, 62-foot diving boat. He has named it “Solitude,” because even his rich-man affectations are lonesome and sad. Gloomiest prostitute-banging party boy ever.

Seeing how he’s only won $240,000 in 4 matches this year, his next endorsement will be for Tiger Ramen Noodles. Old Tiger Woods wiped his shaft with a check so low. All in all a real boo-hoo situation.

 

Rachel Uchitel, Tiger’s Ex-Mistress, Wants to Become a Private Eye

Rachel Uchitel’s latest incarnation (after being Tiger Woods mistress and brief Celebrity Rehab “star”): private detective. She tells the NY Post she will not be tracking down cheating husbands anymore, but rather, “I want to solve cases for the underdog, for people who don’t have a voice.” Also, she might call her firm Puma PI and I quote; “because I’m not yet a cougar.”

Who gives a crap you say? I do. Very much so. Because I love detective novels and this is great material for my first novel:

It was an odd turn of events that led me here, to this dingy office on the wrong side of the tracks, on this dark and stormy night. The sign on the door read ‘R. Uchitel, Private Dick.’ It was ironic, since dick was the reason Rachel got into the sleuthing business. But I had no time to ponder that now. I was in trouble and I needed her help.

Her sleek high heels slammed to the floor as she swiveled to face me. “I learned my trade being hunted by the tabs,” she breathed. And now the hunted is the hunter. “I need your help,” I said, getting down to business as she poured scotch for the both of us. “I’m in big trouble, and I hear you’re the kind of woman who’s not afraid to grab the Tiger by the tale.”

She leaned towards me, her cleavage creating its own punctuation. “I’ve definitely mastered my stroke,” she purred…

Pretty sure I’ve got the beginnings to a New York Times Best Seller on my hands.

 

Tila Tequila Gives Kate Major a STD Covered Kiss

Tabloid writer Kate Major celebrated her birthday with a smooch from attention whore Tila Tequila at West Hollywood’s House of Blues Tuesday night while random people like Michael Lohan and Tila’s new boyfriend Apollo Green looked on (guess she isn’t a lesbian anymore). Basically the who’s who of who gives a crap. Intrestingly enough Tiger Woods’ former porn star mistress Joslyn James, was also there celebrating her 33rd birthday and her nomination for an AVN award .

And I know what you are all thinking; Who are these people and why should I give a shit? Is there a reason that Tila shouldn’t have kissed Kate? Have these people done anything to warrant me caring? Is my life somehow less complete because I don’t know who they are?

The truth is we just wanted to weave Tiger’s name into the most random story possible, SO BAM, mission complete. That $60 office pool is now mine.

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The Tiger Woods & Devon James Sex Tape is a Fake

To the surprise of absolutely no one, that whole Tiger Woods sex tape with porn star Devon James that we were all promised has proven to be an elaborate fake. Taneal Goyco, a relatively unknown cruiser weight boxer, was apparently employed as a Tiger Woods stand-in for the shoot, so that Devon James could make a few bucks off (presumably blind) sex-tape aficionados who can’t tell Tiger Woods from a guy who looks exactly nothing like Tiger Woods.

According to the Tiger doppelganger, Goyco:

I was in it to make a couple bucks and have sex with a pretty lady. I just thought I was fulfilling this woman’s fantasy of having sex with Tiger Woods, as she had said she wanted. I had no idea she was going to set up a tape of Tiger Woods. I wanted to make some money not ruin someone’s life.

Poor guy, he just wanted to bang a “sexy lady” and got that AIDS infected sperm bank instead.

that whole Tiger Woods sex tape with Devon James that we were all promised has proven to be an elaborate fake. Taneal Goyco – a relatively unknown cruiserweight boxer – was apparently employed as a Tiger Woods stand-in for the shoot, so that Devon James could make a few bucks off (presumably blind) sex-tape aficionados who can’t tell Tiger Woods from a guy who looks exactly nothing like Tiger Woods.
 

Tiger Woods Is Back In Business

“Please, Jesus, make this boner go away”


Hide your children, hide your wife, hide your neighbor’s daughters, and hide your husband, cause he’s raping errbody up in here.

You’d have thought that Tiger Woods would be on his best behaviour at the Ryder Cup this week, especially after the headlines he made this year. But it would seem that the golfer just can’t keep that roving eye still in his head, as this picture taken at the Ryder Cup opening ceremony proves.

But then Katherine Jenkins is quite the Welsh beauty, and probably used to having a tiger on her tail.

 

Porn Star Devon James Says She has a Sex Tape With Tiger Woods

I guess it was only a matter of time before a sex tape emerged in the Tiger Woods mistress bonanza. The first up to bat? None other than porn star extraordinaire Devon James, who Radar Online claims is attempting to sell the video for $350k. Apparently, her last double penetration flick didn’t do as well as she had hoped.

Tiger Woods’ porn star mistress Devon James is meeting porn star producer Vivid in the hope of selling an ‘explosive’ sex tape of the golfer, RadarOnline.com has exclusively learned.“The tape is 62 minutes long and 37 minutes of it is us having sex,” James told RadarOnline.com, before boarding a flight from Tampa Bay to Los Angeles, Wednesday.

Wait, wait, wait… hold on a second here. What the hell is going on in the other 25 minutes of the tape? There better not be any dialogue in this flick–straight and to the point, that’s what we want.

But maybe don’t hold your breath. There’s something about Devon James that seems just a teeny bit sketchy. Like the fact that she tried to claim in court that she had some secret, invisible Tiger Woods love child.

Also that her mother says this about the sextape: “My daughter is nothing but a pathological liar… there was no relationship with Tiger Woods.”Also, why the hell did she hang on to the thing for so long? I thought we were done with this whole thing. This is guaranteed to be a disappointment. Maybe just forget about it.

 

Elin Nordegren Goes House Hunting

Tiger Woods’ ex-wife Elin Nordegren spent the Labor Day weekend in South Florida, visiting friends and checking out real estate. Elin left her Orlando-area rental home on Friday with the couple’s children and drove a couple of hours south to the West Palm Beach area.

Tiger’s mother was also in South Florida, staying in a home paid for by the world’s greatest golfer, and Elin made sure her son and daughter spent time with grandma.

Meanwhile, the beautiful blonde visited with two of her close friends and the relief of the divorce was obvious.

“She’s much happier,” said one person familiar with her trip. “The divorce being finalized is obviously helping her get back to herself.

“She had a fun weekend, was really able to relax more than she has in a long time.”

Elin’s divorce from Tiger became final August 23. Terms have not been disclosed, but sources close to the situation tell us that Elin walked away with much more than $100 million.

Basically for that money she can either buy a little house in Palm Beach, or the much better option, buy the entire state of South Dakota, both cost about the same.

 

Elin Nordegren To Receive $750 Million Settlement For Her Silence

It looks as though things are progressing in the complicated battle between Tiger Woods and Elin Nordegren.

According to a recent report, the 30-year-old mother-of-two will receive a record setting $750 million settlement in exchange for never publicly speaking out about her estranged husband’s indiscretions with up to twenty different women. A friend of the Swedish ex-model explains:

The price of the huge sum is her silence: no interviews, tell-all books, or TV appearances about this for the rest of her life -- even if Tiger dies first -- or she'll lose the lot… Tiger’s main fear is [Elin] telling her story after he’s rebuilt his reputation, sending him back to the gutter.

The report also states that Tiger, 34, has agreed to keep single woman away from his two children – Sam, 3, and Charlie, 1 – and can only bring a new woman into their lives if he marries her.

“She is desperate to protect the children from the womanizing side of their father,” continues the friend.

Despite their differences Elin does admit that “Tiger loves his kids and has been a decent dad”, but is also “confident he will not pursue seeing the children that much, due to his work and lifestyle”.

Under their recently signed agreement, Elin is to receive sole physical custody of their two children, while legal custody will be shared between the two.

 

Tiger Woods & Elin Nordegren’s Written Apology

Tiger Woods is one sorry fella!

In his second apology within days, the embattled golf star - along with estranged wife Elin Nordegren - wrote an apology to parents at the preschool where their 2-year-old daughter Sam attends.

According to Florida affiliate WFTV.com, the letter reads:

Dear Premier Academy parents, We would like to share our appreciation for your support over the past several months and offer our personal apology for any inconvenience you are experiencing due to the increased media scrutiny surrounding our children.

 

Tiger’s Snow-Flake is Ready to Collect Her Stacks: Hires Prominent Divorce Lawyer


The best thing to ever happen for Elin Nordegren pockets were those damn kids and Tiger’s reckless intoxication with trashy Becky’s. It’s being reported that she has hired a “big stacks” Bevery Hills divorce attorney, Sorrell Trope. Sorrell has represented the likes of Nic Cage, Britney Spears, and Nicole Kidman. Between the loss of endorsements and brand value, the divorce, and future child support payments, we expect this to cost your boy Tiger over $500 million when it’s all said and done. As we said the other day, a good Malcolm X book would have saved his dumb-ass a “whole lot”. Poor thang.